Okay, I just finished watching the most recent episode of True Blood on HBO…and OMG, I am so excited with how this season is going that I can’t even move my fingers fast enough to keep up with my thoughts. Seriously?!?!
After the season with that crazy lady who was having sex orgies and Tara fell in love, I thought that storyline was ridiculous, but no, True Blood has out True Blood-ed itself. This season has seriously tested our loyalty to certain characters and has completely made us root for characters that have turned us off in previous seasons. Example #1: PAM. I officially love her. Example #2: BILL. WTF is he doing?!?
I never thought I would say these words, but I am on Team Eric. I’m sorry Bill, but you are showing a side of yourself that I frankly don’t care for. And with only three episodes left, Bill has a lot to prove, as does the show itself.
Below is literally (okay I might have added additional thoughts I had) a text conversation that my bestie and I had while watching True Blood. Disclaimer: we are two of the same people – she is slightly funnier than me, so yea, sorry if it’s hard to follow. In addition, she actually read the Sookie Stackhouse books.
DB: Are you watching?
JB: Yep, waiting for it to start.
DB: Pam and Tara…loving it!
JB: Right! I love Pam!
JB: Do you think Pam and Tara will have a lesbian tryst?
DB: Possibly, but I think Pam stays away from fish human because their blood is fishy.
DB: “Just ‘cause we drank a bitch together doesn’t makes us Oprah and Gale.”
JB: Hahahaha I giggled to myself at the one!!
JB: I don’t like new Bill.
DB: Me either! I feel like he’s playing a game, but I don’t like it.
JB: Still love Eric though.
DB: Yeah, I’m on it.
JB: Everyone gets on the Eric train at some point
DB: I may be late but I’m enjoying the party
JB: About time! LOL
DB: Eric trusts Bill too easily here. Poor choice.
JB: I know, when did Eric become the good guy?
DB: I like what they are doing with Jason.
JB: But I’m not a fan of Jessica this season.
DB: I thought they were going to kill her off, but now I’m not so sure.
JB: Sookie bores me. (yawn!)
DB: I know! Sookie is more annoying than Nora.
DB: Gran totally set Sookie up for failure. Do you think Lafayette’s language translates into death language?
JB: I don’t think Lafayette’s language translates to anyone! LOL!
DB: OMG! WTF is up with Sookie?
JB: So is Sally Mae or whatever the f*ck her name is Lilith?
DB: I think when Bill is “high” he sees Sookie as Lilith? I don’t know.
DB: Patrick is going shit crazy
JB: Wasn’t he always crazy? lol
JB: Oh Jason!! So pretty
DB: I wonder what dead pussy smells like?
JB: She’s scary!
DB: Damn! She’s crazy!
DB: That frying pan came out of no where
JB: No, it came from ugly bitch!
DB: Yes, President Obama is in this fictional town – that would be a crazy cameo.
JB: Obama must be so proud right now
DB: Do you think Mrs. Obama watches and is like, “Look, hunny! You’re on True Blood!”
DB: Sheriff Dearborne = Dragon
DB: Yes, Andy, yes
DB: The Boots!!! I see the light bulbs go off.
JB: They don’t seem the most stealth lol
DB: Hoyt is going to die, isn’t he?
JB: Hoyt can die – he annoys me
DB: This could be the end of Terry :(
JB: I don’t think so
DB: OMG! Arlene
DB: Arlene is such a badass here
DB: Patrick is totally lying about his family here to Terry
JB: In the clutch! She’s the bitch to have around.
JB: She should have just killed him!
JB: That pencil is bad ass! He’d kill Terry without a second thought.
JB: I hate that Eric is all about Nora.
DB: Right?!?! Btw: Hate Nora!
DB: She’s annoying and slightly crazy…
JB: <3 Eric
DB: That blood is like acid for vamps
JB: I think its fairy blood.
DB: Weird thing with Sookie. What is happening?
JB: I don’t know :(
JB: This shit is crazy!
DB: Literally bananas!
JB: I want one of those bedroom sexy robes.
JB: See she thinks Hoyt’s a pussy as well.
DB: Hahah she probably engulfs Bud when they have sex
JB: I bet she’s on top.
DB: Eww! Visual = Gross
DB: OMG Poor Bud
JB: Run, fat bitch, run!
DB: Didn’t Patrick think Terry would do it?
JB: That storyline was….Different lol.
DB: I kind of like Russell and that guy together
DB: Well, that’s girl dead
JB: Bill drank the Kool-aid
DB: I hate Bill so much! I hate him!
DB: Didn’t Bill ever read the Bro-Code?
JB: Apparently not!!! He’s influenced by the pussy.
JB: And here comes the war between Bill and Eric.
DB: I’m actually angry right now
JB: Bill has always been easily swayed…Pussy.
DB: So annoyed. And totally over this fairy stuff with Sookie. Lame.
DB: Almost on the verge of not wanting to watch this anymore
JB: What?!? You know the last 3 are going to be soo good cuz there’s that twist we have been waiting for all season.
DB: If it doesn’t involve Bill staking that bitch then I don’t want to watch
DB: I’m going to watch. I’m as big of a pussy as Bill. Or maybe someone will destroy that blood or Russell will stake that bitch.
JB: You know she’s gonna die!! I hope Eric bitch slaps Bill as well.
DB: Oh, or has sex with Sookie in front of him and forces him to watch.
JB: HAHAHHAHAHAHA!!! Even better.
DB: I think there’s going to be a power struggle between some of these vamps and bitches
JB: RIGHT! Cuz we knew it was coming!
DB: Yeah, everyone thinks they’re the one.
JB: I think Bill will kill Sallymae
DB: He better
And, in a nutshell that was our take on the most recent episode and what’s to come.
Didn’t make sense? Then you haven’t been watching :)