Religion & Relationships: The Tom & Katie Effect
We all know relationships are about compromise, but what about when it comes to your religion? Like me, have you always pictured your daughter getting ready to receive her first communion in a little white poofy dress? When it comes down to it, religion is about beliefs, but don’t you dare doubt that everyone loves the tradition of it as well.
I grew up with a Catholic mother and a Jewish father. Both were raised in an all Italian neighborhood in Brooklyn, and no, neither of them are Italian. People ask me all the time, “How was it for you to grow up with two parents who don’t share a religion?” My answer: perfectly fine, my dad is basically an Atheist. Lucky for me, my mom was the only one in the relationship with strong beliefs so I didn’t have to grow up being constantly confused. I must admit though, there is a part of me that thinks, “Hey, it would have been interesting to understand my Jewish heritage had my dad not lost all interest in it after he had his Bar Mitzvah.”
What I have found, is that religion can be a barrier in a relationship. In the past, I had a long term relationship with a guy who was Jewish. Sure, he gave me the usual spiel, “I made my Bar Mitvah, and yes I am Jewish, but I don’t really believe in God and I don’t care how we raise our future children.” Fast forward a year later when his older brother married a Christian woman – you would have thought the world was ending. Something suddenly clicked – and BOOM! – our relationship crumbled into pieces because he realized that he did in fact care about his children being raised Jewish. Thanks, buddy, glad you realized that before we got married and had children.
Today it was reported by multiple news outlets that Katie Holmes filed for divorce from Tom Cruise, who we all know both practice Scientology. TMZ has reported that this split has been due to Cruise’s extreme beliefs and that Holmes was never really crazy about the religion. Interesting. What’s even more shocking is that Holmes is requesting full custody of Suri. It turns out that since Suri recently turned 6 years old, it is about the time when she would get more involved in the scientology practices. This was a no-go for Holmes, who clearly felt so strongly about this that she ended her five year marriage to Cruise. So, this begs the question: does religion bring people together or tear them apart?
As much as we’d like to say that religion doesn’t matter – it does. Most people throw it by the wayside until you realize that your children are being taught things you don’t believe in – like Holmes.
Have you face issues with religion in your relationships? Comment below.
