All By Myself
You know that saying, “When it rains it pours?” I feel like someone should make up another saying to express the complete opposite of that. I’m thinking something like, “When it’s dry- it’s dryer than the Sahara desert.” Right now, I am clearly in the dry season, also known as being single. What makes it even harder is that not just one, but all of my best friends are in serious, intense relationships with their future spouses. So what do I do? I go out with my friends…and their significant others. I know what you are probably thinking, “Doesn’t that make you more depressed?” And the honest answer is- yes, maybe a little on occasion. But what am I going to do? Sit at home and watch romantic comedies while I dream of that actually happening to me? Definitely not.
The reason I decided to pursue this course of action is because I cannot, or better yet, I REFUSE to go on another bad date. I just can’t put myself through the torture. Once upon a time, I loved dating. I used to get so excited about learning more about a new guy in my life and I would look forward to that oh so special first kiss. These days I actually dread everything about a first date. Even mustering up the strength to pick out that perfect first date outfit is draining and I always ask my roommate to help me. The reason I feel this way is because I know that once the hooplah and excitement is over, it’s probably going to lead to yet another one of my very short lived relationships. You know the type- really hot and heavy in the beginning, then it inevitably fizzles out because you realize you ultimately have nothing in common.
I have had way too many of those relationships and am just at the point now where I don’t want to waste anymore time on someone I am not really into. I’m sure there must be other people out there that feel this way, or at least I hope there are. After a while of being single, you become asexual (no, not like Michael Jackson) more like indifferent. You could really care less about the opposite sex. I am at the point now in my single-hood where I just don’t care anymore. Trust me, I know that this isn’t the way to be but for some reason right now, I just need to be in this phase for a little bit for my own mental sanity. So, until that special someone comes along that can actually hold my attention for longer than a minute, I will be all by myself, and for some reason oddly content about it.
